Love Child; Poor Child

Like my previous post, I’ll be writing an essay presenting on another position again. This time around, on another 2 different stories namely “The Merry Maid” written by our very own Dr. Jayakaran Mukundan and “A Great Injustice” by Hweah Chwee Sian. I shall keep this short; and hopefully sweet.

Very briefly, the first story tells of Lakshmi, an Indian lady and her daughter who she gave away to a Malay family at a very young age. After years of separation, Lakshmi worked her way to meet her daughter, now Sakinah. She had wanted to kidnap her away from her current home but decided it wasn’t the right thing to do and gave up. The second story on the other hand, highlights the issue of abortion. Ah Nya who was pregnant with Steven’s kid was ostracized by the community she lived with. Steven refused to marry her and caused her a lot of shame. In the end, she had her baby killed via abortion.

Honestly, it was pretty hard to come to a conclusion on a common issue in both stories. From my group’s perspective, abortion isn’t the core issue. Instead, it is about the innocent child born out of wedlock, or in Ah Nya’s case, still-born. A major part of the story revolves around the fate of the child and the consequences of having one. Therefore, we decided upon this position:

“Modern Malaysian Society still holds Harsh Judgment towards Pre-marital Sex Resulting in the Birth of a Love Child”

Unlike the modern society of today, those in the past clearly reject the idea of pre-marital sex. It is only now that society is beginning to be more open to this notion as a way of practising individual freedom. However, it doesn’t seem to be so in the Malaysian context. Harsh judgments are still passed around rampantly without constraint. So the question is, why? We are a considerable modern society already. Yet, we are not allowing our people to practise their rights. Bringing the 2 stories into picture, the reasons are as follows.

1.    Importance of marriage

Marriage, as we know it, is a rite of passage that all must go through before moving on to the next stage of life.  It is a duty, with all due respect to religion, that must be carried out for a righteous path to the continuation of life. As the law of Malaysia states, the father of a child born before marriage would not be recognized. In other words, it is legally not accepted to have a child before one is married. Hence, when Ah Nya found out she was pregnant, her very first thought was marriage. Likewise, Lakshmi who already had made a mistake of having a child before her marriage, was eager to get married first the second time around before she conceives her second child.

Family pride and dignity

Malaysian society deems pride and dignity a family issue more than that of an individual’s. It relates heavily to a family’s status, upbringing and education background. Therefore, what one does would eventually be related to these issues; be it good or bad. Both Ah Nya and Lakshmi knew what they have done would bring great shame to their family. Thus, the former decided to abort her baby while the latter, gave it away.

Financial matters

Both couples in the mentioned stories are very young and immature at the time their love child was conceived. Being at such a tender age, the society believes them to be too immature to handle heavy responsibilities of building a family. They were not working and hence still dependent on their families in many areas of their lives; one of which is financial support. If they had taken unto their own to continue building heir families, it would perhaps result in the ruins of the following generation – the lack of education, emotional maturity, and financial support.

Nature of Society

As much as we all are a part of the big society of the world, the nature of each individually diverse society differs. While cultures of the majority part of the globe practices individual freedom, our Malaysian society observes a collectivist nature. Modernism exhibits individualism as rights of every human to exercise freedom of speech, act among the many. However, here in Malaysia, we are still very much at the mercy of society’s perception; and because we are, all that we do is expected to fall in line with that of the majority public. When we fail to do so, we are ridiculed – like Ah Nya and compelled to conform – like Lakshmi.

It is very interesting to note the differences between our own country and the major parts of the world in this issue of pre-marital sex and love child. Though still conservative by nature, I’m proud to say we are a country with a firm stand on what we believe to be right. 

Arranged Marriages. Yay? Nay?

NO. I am not getting married as much as I would love to now. I’m kidding. No, not the getting married part. I would love to but..okay. I shall elaborate no further. Off topic already.

“The Modern Society of Today will not tolerate the Ideals of Arranged Marriage.”

In a world so modern and free, it is hard to imagine that arranged marriages still continue to manifest in certain cultures, especially that of the Indians. Every now and then we hear debates over such marriages versus love marriages. Today, class was no different. Based on 2 short stories – “Everything’s Arranged” and “A Question of Dowry”, I dare say the modern society of today will not tolerate the ideals of arranged marriage; just as our position highlighted above.

In brief, “Everything’s Arranged” is the story of Rukumani and Devanayagam, the 2 forbidden lovers whose parents are all for arranged marriages. Unknowing to this couple, their parents have already arranged for both of them to tie the knot. However, when their love was exposed, the arrangement was called off. It was, as the family has put it, a shame to have them known and loved each other before they were supposed to be married. “A Question of Dowry” on the other hand is about Sivasothie’s tragic end to a wedding arrangement similar to that of Rukumani’s. The difference being that the latter was due to money matters – dowry. That aside, it is the arranged marriage that my groupmates and I decide to highlight.

As marriageable youths of the 21^st century, we find this issue irrelevant to the way of life today. What the older generation deemed as ideal, we believe is no longer practical. First and foremost, one is stripped away from the liberty of decision-making. There is no freedom to practise one’s rights to choose a life partner. Rukumani and Sivasothie are both bounded to their families’ decisions. Even when the former tried to break free, she had heavy consequences to pay. Marriages are forever, supposedly. Those who believe in arranged marriages believe they really do as long as the couples are not involved with each other in any way before their marriage. Love can be nurtured. So they say. More often than not we know that is not the case within today’s modern society. Even marrying the person you love can end up in divorce, what more one that you don’t know if you can love. It’s a risk that will last a lifetime.

Secondly, a modern society also exercises the importance of education. Like Rukumani who attends a university, her exposure to education broadens her perspectives on life especially regarding relationships and marriages. She compares herself to Amy and Johnny who are free to love each other. She reflects on her own wishes and acts on it. Unlike her parents, she is no longer confined to traditional views. The modern ideals of practising self-rights and independence have permeated the younger generation deeper than the older ones can imagine; and credits go to knowledge and exposure that comes with education.

Thirdly, injustice to women’s rights. Arranged marriages place women on a platform similar to that of inanimate objects with a price tag. It denies a woman’s rights to be human, to be heard, to be loved. Both women in the story have no rights to say anything and neither are they allowed to defend themselves. They are instead sold as goods. Both the girls were paraded like goods for sale by the family without their consent, as if they had no feelings and thoughts of their own. It is a great disgrace to women to be made so cheap and invaluable.

Lastly, arranged marriages deny love. As humans, we are all blessed with the gift of feeling. We know what love is. However, arranged marriages do not consider this natural emotion as relevant at all to a marriage. Instead, it is bought with a prize – the dowry. This deprives the couple involved of the God-given human affections. Sivasothie never had the chance to love. Rukumani however, was robbed of her chance.

Clearly, arranged marriages aren’t that ideal after all. Yet, I am aware of the prevalence of differing thoughts still present in the society today despite modernism. Nevertheless, we still believe that the modern society of today will not tolerate the ideals of arranged marriage.

I felt like I just wrote an argumentative essay. Gosh. How dry. Presenting it was definitely more interesting. Anyway, this gave me a rather good preview for my coming position paper though. It already sounds like one more than anything else. Haha. But it was good. I had the chance to refine my persuasive skills. Likewise, my presentation skills. Like debates, there is always only the choice between 2 options, either one or the other. I am by nature more of a person who sits in the gray areas, therefore, this was good exercise to polish my firm stand on the position I have chosen.

So, arranged marriages? Nay.

Akeelah and The Bee

Akeelah puts me to shame. Seriously. There’re tonnes of words out there that she spelled which I can’t! and to think she’s only 11. But of course, it’s only a movie. I would like very much to believe it’s just that. But then again, I would also like to believe there really exist kids like her; and surely, a teacher like Dr. Joshua Larabee.

She’s one lucky girl, I must say. So was I. Like Akeelah, I was blessed with wonderful teachers who developed my English proficiency by leaps and bounds. 16 years ago, I was as Chinese as one could get from a student of a typical Chinese school. Following a 2 year stay in the UK, I pride myself now in being bilingual, and a fairly good one at that. The change I would love to credit to my two wonderful primary 2 and 3 teachers from Birmingham’s Woodgate’s Junior and Infant School – my primary school during my stay there. I was new, I was Chinese, I knew only ABCs and XYZs.

“How did you come to school?”

“Teacher, I use leg.”

(Joke of the year and the many following years.)

So much for all the English lessons in school. Shame on me. Shame on me. With love and patience, Mrs. Williams and Mrs. Richards sat down with me every single day after school to read with me. They read me stories, they gave me books to bring home and they showered me with endless praises when I do well. In fact, there was not one time that they scolded me when I made mistakes. It was only encouragement all the way.

Now that I too, am going to be a teacher in the near future, there is so much I could draw from this movie and past experiences with the awesome teachers I had myself. Dr. Joshua Larabee taught me the most important lesson of all – believe in your student as much as you want her to believe in herself. Despite her ability to spell better than the others, she was an outcast in school. Hence, she refused to let herself shine; until Dr. Larabee came by. He challenged her and gave her reasons to believe she can do better than she already is. He showed her what spelling really is – not just rote memorization of letters but rather, an understanding of the mechanics and history of the words themselves. It amazed me how he broke the big words into smaller parts and elicited meanings for each of them. Having known the language that long I am ashamed to say I have never really paid attention to this aspect of it.

As a movie, I’d give this a two thumbs up. The beginning of its plot shows us a fairly conventional movie. However, something happens during the finals of the National Spelling Bee that we never saw coming; and it is this ending that touches me the most. What she did for Dylan, her final opponent, only he can understand; and he did. That’s what made the ending even more beautiful – with both these kids emerging as co-champions for the first time ever in the history of the National Spelling Bee. Winning isn’t everything; and Akeelah Anderson understood that. Her generosity and empathy taught her that doing the right thing involves more than just winning. This is what makes this movie even more valuable.

Our Deepest Fear

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, handsome, talented and fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God within us.
It is not just in some; it is in everyone.

And, as we let our own light shine, we consciously give
other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.

It isn’t the fear of losing that should frighten us, but rather, the fear of not knowing what we’re capable of doing to win.

Our deepest fear is that we’re powerful beyond measure. Believe it.

of chocolate and candy; and everything yummy

Dang. I’m hungry.

That has absolutely nothing to do with this post. Not entirely. I told the class the other day a story of chocolate and candy and everything yummy.  

The house! The house! I see the house! *hungry*

I told them Hansel and Gretel. Haha! XD

The reason I chose this story: I was hungry. Point blank. Ha! No offence to Brothers Grimm, but it is for a fact that I was indeed hungry when we were assigned this story-sharing task. And it so happened that this was the only story I could think of that contains food (at that moment). It is not however, my favourite children story. In fact, it is a least favourite. I’ll tell you why.

Though sporting a happy ending, something about this story gives me the creeps. Imagine a wicked stepmother. Then imagine getting lost in the deep dark woods. Next, imagine a cannibalistic witch. Finally, imagine a burning body in the oven. Tell me this is not going to give you nightmares. Rather than a children’s story, I honestly think this qualifies more for a horror film. However, that is of course coming from a casual reader’s point of view.

From a literary perspective, I find these are the elements worth noting. The storyline and characters, though dark and grim, brings about an interesting blend of fear and excitement. Not unlike most stories involving wicked stepmothers and witches, this story taps into the fear of every child. It keeps children in the suspense of their fears for the two children mentioned in the story. However, this suspense takes a halt when a house of candy and confectionary comes into picture. This imagination relieves children of their fear and brings them instead into a world of pleasure and fantasy. Then again, this fear is immediately brought back into the frame with the reveal of the witch. While most stories would keep it constant, Hansel and Gretel cleverly weaves this fear and develops it to reach greater emotional effectiveness. It captures children’s attention towards the end of the story with a faster pace of horror that threatens to kill. At its peak, the story comes to a joyous end. For a young child to experience this intense horror and joy all at once, I dare say would be quite a ride. Nonetheless, this story promotes much value of courage and wits.

All of us, as a child once, surely aspired to be heard, to be looked-up upon to the extent of being heroic. In the case of Hansel and Gretel, the storyline captures this aspiration and makes it a dream come true. Gretel, a girl, being the weaker of two genders, is portrayed as a heroine who saved his brother from the wicked witch. Hansel, on the other hand, is granted the wits to outsmart their stepmother who sent them away. In one way or another, this is a message to children that even as a child, they’re capable of many things. To the adults, there is a Robin Hood, if not an Einstein in every child.

Like I’ve said earlier, this sounds more like a horror film than a bedtime story. I still believe so despite all that I’ve said. Hence, if I were a parent reading this story, I might prefer to do it to an older child, say that of 8 and above. It would also help a great deal in comforting the horror if the story is accompanied with its values when told. At least, that’s what I believe would be appropriate with this story.

I must’ve made this post very eerie. I just felt a chill. But trust me, if I were to tell a children story again, I would still stick to this. It’s a story that’s one of its kind. If accompanied with great illustrations, it's a definite feast for the eyes!

chocolate and candy~ chocolate and candy~ chocolate and candy~

That's it. I'm off to eat. 


~and everything yummy~ :D

Hello. Buffalo. Gruffalo. Gruffalo?!

Presenting the...

..Eh?!  Sorry. Wrong one.

Presenting the...

buffGruffalo!

“A gruffalo? What’s a gruffalo?”

“A gruffalo! Why, didin’t you know? He has terrible tusks, and terrible claws, and terrible teeth in his terrible jaws.”

Believe me, it isn’t that terrible at all.

no gruesome 'makan-makan' and all. no no.

Or at least, the story isn’t.

Unlike ‘Edwina the Emu’, ‘The Gruffalo’ captured me right from its title to its message between the lines of the story. Gruffalo? In all my 20 plus years of exposure to English, what on earth was a gruffalo?! The innocence of a child was lost on me for a while; and it wasn’t until the story unfolds a little mouse that goes around spinning tales of an imaginary beast to scare of potential predators who may make him their food that it hits me. Oh..right. There is no such thing. Silly me.

And just when you thought the story is going to end with the mouse reigning victorious with his little made-up beast, the story presents a twist – his imaginary beastly friend isn’t that imaginary after all! And so the mouse becomes dinner. The end.

Not quite. Julia Donaldson is one smart author that keeps you surprised. Not only did the mouse not become the gruffalo’s dinner, he almost made him his! Instead of succumbing to this deadly fate, this witty little mouse twisted his luck and showed the gruffalo who’s boss of the woods. Taking the same route he came from, his predators ran at the sight of him (we all know it was the gruffalo). At that, the story finally came to an end with the gruffalo running away fearing for his life.

now you tell me who's boss?

Isn’t that smart? This story did not only manage to incorporate a number of twists, but also surprises you at every turn of the page. The colourful illustrations of the woods and its residents compliment the story so well that you’re so easily hooked onto the book. Apart from its rhyming concept, the story also plays skillfully at the fears of every young child; heightening it at the climax and then downplays it at the conclusion. Even the scariest of monsters aren’t as frightening as they seem; and even the most harmless of creatures can be threatening. Between these lines, the story teaches kids to never underestimate others. Nor should they be discouraged at being physically small.

Who says you can't be small and mighty?

On a whole, this is one wicked story. If you get what I mean. Two thumbs up for Julia Donaldson and Alex Sheffler. I’m giving this a 9 out of 10. An awesome storyline with excellent illustrations. For all you people looking for a children storybook, this is one good buy. Very noteworthy values are instilled and also, it might just come in handy when putting your kids to bed.

When the sun goes to hide and here comes the night,

You’d better head to bed and hold your blankie tight,

Or the gruffalo, rawwwwrrr, the gruffalo may come to bite!

 :D

Yeek~!

This is an emu.

Small head. Huge body. Long neck. Long legs. Feathered. Ugly. Pretty.

This is also an emu.

It is called Edwina. And yes, she's wearing a god-forbidden very pretty red tutu. -____-'''

Don’t get me wrong. I love Edwina. As a matter of fact, Edwina is quite an emu. Much to my surprise, this story - ‘Edwina the Emu’ actually managed to catch my attention. You see, when I first saw her, I cringed. Not a very big fan of this ostrich lookalike due to an unfortunate childhood event. And the illustrations weren’t helping. I was utterly disturbed. But then again, to kids, Australian kids rather, these emus might just be their favourite feathered-creature. Edwina is after all of Australian nationality, so to speak. That aside, what really piqued my interest was its storyline.

In this sequel to ‘Edward the Emu’, Edwina who has just laid 10 eggs tells Edward to stay home and watch them while she heads out into the world to look for a job. Out there, Edwina tries her luck in various fields such as ballet dancing and chimney sweeping, both of which she was turned away and fired respectively for her ‘emu-ness’. When she finally lands herself in a job as a waiter, she quits instead after freaking out at the discovery of a product which she is to serve – eggs.

no wonder. poor thing.

Unlike most children stories I’ve come to know, this story is one that comes across bringing more than just issues of morals and virtues. It provides a peek into some worthy topics uncommon to stories for the young. Stylistically, this story is written in simple English with repetitive rhyme, simple plot and just two major characters – Edwina and her partner, Edward. The constant sentence pattern that it is written in allows kids to capture the story faster and more efficiently. Like most stories, it is direct to the point and doesn’t complicate.

What makes it different however, is the underlying message it is trying to convey. At the beginning of this story itself, there is already a strong sense of feminism; which is a very rare issue to be raised in a children story. Not that this is surprising at all to the Australian society where women have pretty powerful say in the country. Look at Julia Gillard, Kristina Keneally, to name a few. But in the Malaysian context, this is fairly new. Edwina, representing the females, is out working while Edward, the representation of males is the homemaker; seemed somewhat irrelevant to societies where men is always seen as the breadwinner. Nevertheless, interpretation is subjective. One can always look at this story in light of the values of equality. ‘Edwina the Emu’ reinforces the message that both men and women should hold a fair share of responsibility in caring for their home. At the same time, it highlights topics of birth (as according to our storyteller :P) and discrimination. Though subtle, these are issues worth noting in assisting a child build his foremost knowledge of them.

If I were to rate this book, I guess I would give it a 7 out of 10. Perhaps a little biased due to the illustrations, but my credits go to the storyline. It promotes the voice of today, unconventional to the traditional perspective of women.

For the love of children stories, I will TRY to not discriminate emus. TRY.

fine. I WILL NOT.

Blah.

I think blogging’s too pretty a word to describe what I post here; or am going to.

My thoughts are often so random I have trouble putting them together. Decently.

I’m no writer. Honestly. Not a creative one at least. But…but…“everybody can write.” (2010, Dr. M. Jayakaran) No?

You be my witness. For the sake of EDU 3234, I’ll try to blah blog properly.

sure hope I'm not.

Thank you for the opportunity. And thank YOU for reading :)